I have 3 interviews 
1. Today for a pageant 
2. Monday for a event modeling/brand ambassador agency 
3. Middle Eastern Turkish adult Magazine

All interviews are video interviews
I loved medicine professionally. And I loveeeee theater and acting professionally. But I don’t love singing and cover girl modeling as much as acting. 

The only reason I applied to the above 3 is because when I first got back to nyc last October, I did a lot of content creation in beauty and got invited to beauty events. I started posting more SHOWER 🚿 content, & a lot of older men started being very persistent in dating me. When I said no, they started offering things, gifts 🎁, jobs 🏥, money 💰, apartment 🏠 Tv 📺 credit card 💳 eventually I gave in cause all this sounded pretty amazing compared to living at my aunt’s and I wanted to be independent in nyc so badly. 
After I dated one old man, and he gave me everything … lots of cash 💰 lots of love ❤️ spoiled me a lot with food, attention and just about everything …
Then more older men started asking me out this year and offered the same and more.
But… when I did get a job and have my own money and can buy my own things, it’s very hard to be doll for the older men. I know that if today I went to the older men that ask me out, they will do everything to make sure I’m happy with money and gifts 🎁 but I don’t really want all this, deep down in my heart and pussy I believe in eternal love and I want to stay independent and look for true love 
What’s wrong with me?