Some of us didn't think we'd see fees this low ever again. 

That's what it is for now. Everything has tradeoffs. People who want to put in $50 will have to start with custodial LN, liquid or an ecash/fedimint IOU. If they don't continue to stack, then they will stay there. Hopefully they'll learn the benefits of bitcoin and continue to stack towards selfsovereignty by either transferring that onchain in a larger UTXO, or into a self custodies LN channel for spending.

The stuff you argue about for Bitcoin is the same stuff your other block chains will need to deal with once they get significant adoption. Which is unlikely ever to happen.