That's the issue. I'm actively going for my long term goals and dreams. The only times I feel good are when I think I have it or I'm on the right path. Issue is that it's never the case and it's always, ALWAYS, a massive fake out. Like I'll be there for a minute but then immediately followed up by horrible news that both revokes what I achieved and puts me in a worse spot. It's like the harder I try the worse things get and not trying also makes things worse. Idk man.