What is the harm in sleeping with a bunch of women while single? If it’s all consensual and you haven’t lied to any of them, why do some people insist it is degenerate? Don’t use the argument that God said so because that can’t be proven.


You may not realize it but it's harmful, potentially damaging to your relationship with your future wife, as well as all of those women as well. You might expect the same thing from every woman but it's just not the case

You'll always think back about other women instead of the one you're actually with

No advantages from being a player. Even if it is consensual


It’s literally no one else’s bees wax.  Use a condom so there’s no consequences, and everyone is happy.  Well, unless you discover you have screwed a psychopath stalker Klingon, but that’s also no one else’s business.


Gotta test drive it first


I see nothing wrong


Depends on the people. Most people underestimate the spiritual power of sex and the connection that you form with a partner. Anecdotally, those who sleep around excessively experience a lot of suffering due to their actions. But it’s ultimately none of my business.


Are you familiar with the hot crazy matrix? ☝🏻😅


Yes of course! 😂


Can you expand a little more on the spiritual power of sex? That sounds interesting


Always wrap it up.

At least until we maybe find out that STDs are a psyop? 😂


These are good points. I have thought of other women in my past while dating someone but it wasn’t because I wanted to get back with them. I think our brains just seek out scarcity. So over time we take what we have for granted. Because as soon as my current gf becomes my ex, I’ll be thinking about her when I’m with the next girl lol

I also remember thinking about crushes I had in the past while I was with my first gf. So I was even thinking about other women that I never had sex with. I don’t think sex is the issue. We’re just wired this way. Kinda like how someone that earns a million dollars immediately wants to earn another million.

Also, my relationship with my first gf that I loved very much couldn’t have gone anywhere because I was always curious what other options were out there. I never even had sex with her. You can’t really know what you want or who is good for you without exploring. And you can’t learn the important lesson that people wear masks in the early dating stage without exploring multiple people.


Quality over quantity. Take in mind that players tend to have daughters rather than sons later on. 😉


Girls are better anyway 🫡


Dunno man you gotta be careful with that shit. If she becomes into you and you're just hitting it then it's harsh emotionally. Always a risk the contraception fails and you're stuck with a one nighter. As I got older I only poke once she's fully vetted, keep that mind clear.


I get paranoid sometimes even with a condom on I prefer to pull out just in case. But girls don’t really like that lmao


lol I'm into you babe just not that into you. Just make sure you settle down with a low body count if they still exist.


Of course🫡


Sometimes just examining the fact that you feel the need to ask a particular question can reveal something about what you may already know on a deeper level.

As someone who has done it & was always honest with them, it can be fun, but it won't bring any sort of real satisfaction, & it won't really make you feel less lonely. And either you hook up with people who are completely broken (not smart for all sorts of reasons) or you eventually have to hurt all of them because they will all want to be the one you choose & none of them will be. You can certainly learn things in the process, but the biggest lesson or realization for me was that I actually wanted to find someone with whom I could really connect & build a future with, & that it was stupid to waste so much time not actively looking for her.

Post covid, I don't want to fuck anything that got jabbed so I think quality would be my primary focus either way.


Sex is supposed to be the physical representation &/or celebration of a deep mental & emotional bond that you have with another person. When the mental & emotional connection isn't there, the sex will often just leave you feeling empty.

It's kinda like throwing a birthday party with no birthday to celebrate.


I'll let you know how it goes. I wanted a son first.


I’ve seen a lot of nostr evangelists attack men for being degens and sleeping with women or attacking women that post naked pictures of themselves. I was just wondering if these negative views are all based on religion.

But I agree with you I’ve never felt satisfied for very long. However, some of them I had great connections with despite knowing it wouldn’t lead anywhere. And I learn a lot about myself and about them. It’s a nice experience and I like having those memories. Sometimes they do end messy with someone getting hurt but it’s because I wasn’t very clear about what I wanted.


Being a girl dad > being a boy dad

https://video.nostr.build/8165f8dfd45199eda6ece4ac017ec0b6d60ef2e38d7e48fddcfadbca900b7513.mp4


That is an opinion and I respect it. And I can see why you look at it that way. Thanks for sharing 🫂


That's cute as hell - my daughter is all "grown up" now, but, as much as everyone may keep telling me she's a fully grown adult, every time I see/speak to her it's this sort of age I see her as 🥰


I love this. Makes me more excited to have a daughter someday 💜🫂


I’ll try my best - I’m having a hard time trying to express what I’m thinking.

Good sex is a tribute to yourself and your partner. It is a very intimate experience - you are allowing someone else to be a part of your life and an extension of yourself in a way you wouldn’t allow others to.

For women, you are quite literally allowing someone else to be a part of yourself, and there is a big element of trust and vulnerability which comes with that.

For men, you are expressing love for someone physically, while also celebrating yourself and your character. People have all different kinds of styles to do this in, but generally there is an idea of masculinity which you are embodying. Traits such as strength, courage, decisiveness, and trustworthiness come to mind.

Sex is ultimately an act of reproduction, in the purely biological sense. It doesn’t have to be used just for reproduction, but the possibility is always there. For women, reproduction is a very costly and time consuming thing which ideally is done with a partner that they love and trust. This will always play a factor in sex.

When you make this connection with someone, it’s permanent. You will always know them on that deeper level, no matter if you never see them again, or if you get married. For most people, making a ton of these connections and having them all leave after is incredibly psychologically damaging. You start to either undervalue yourself, or distrust others, potentially both. This isn’t as damaging for men generally, but it’s a pretty universal possibility.

In many ways, we are spiritual beings, and our physical actions are a representation of our values. I’m not trying to come across as a prude - I unfortunately understand the spiritual power of sex and the danger of bad/frequent connections because I’ve had experiences which I’m not proud of.


Greatest privilege of my life is being her dad - going back to your initial post...I've played the field...as I've got older its got less satisfying and I wish I'd been more like my dad and grandad...proper long term relationships that last.


Yeah I noticed it’s less satisfying to me now that I’m a little older too. I think as we understand ourselves better, we tend to value those superficial things less. But I also think some people that never understood themselves well end up getting divorced and then going through this phase even though they’re older. So maybe it’s just a phase?


Very good points thank you for sharing 🫂


to elaborate a bit on the idea, I'll make a few claims:
if regeneration is a positive feedback loop than
degeneration is a negative feedback loop.

why does this apply to "sleeping around?"
it causes individuals to become desensitized to the aforementioned spiritual aspect of sexual relationships
it causes many to remain in toxic relationships, casual or formal, much longer than they might otherwise
it increases biohazard risk in a population
it can cause a lot of unwanted pregnancy and the issues that arise from that, single parents, unhealthy parental lifestyles, unnecessary debt, etc.
sexual expectations may not align with reality after having slept around when a young person finally settles down with a spouse, causing marital tensions in some cases

of course life is messy and doesn't follow all of these claims in every situation, but society wide I think that it is fair to say it degenerates society to some degree for these above reasons.

all that being said, as a young man, largely lonely I would've rolled my eyes at my above comment, but post marriage and children, I recognize that there is more to this than simply "God says"


I don't think I could ever be with someone who put themselves on display that way. I have no problem with the fact that some do. I suspect that the choice to do so isn't usually the result of anything particularly healthy. But it doesn't do anyone any good to attack or condemn people for something that harms no one.

There seems to be all sorts of insecurity on both sides of the sexual divide. Religious people are like sexual anorexics or bulimics, & then there are sex workers who are basically the sexually "obese." Neither being good examples of a healthy approach to the subject.


Sexual anorexics and sexually obese is a really good metaphor! I agree with you and I don’t think I could be with a woman that did OF or anything like that. But I also don’t see the harm in them doing that. Their business with their customers is completely consensual.


Interesting points. I’m not religious but when I remove the “spiritual” element, it still holds weight. Seems like civilization advanced much faster than our evolutionary/biological programming.


I don't think divorce is a good idea generally, therefore the key is to be happy by yourself first, then you can commit. Definitely know yourself before entering a relationship. Be careful not to drown yourself in a sea of pointless pussies, in the wise words of Hank Moody.


Tiffany...
nostr:nevent1qqsf9kcj9yf2xelvzvm07w8ygxjxkd8jjqyuw545etjmq9yh2uztffspz3mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuetcd96zuur4vgpzq3dn25suxy49mfxz2krs8t2tu0fwd5yvsyj4z52v0g0t026l5rcyqvzqqqqqqy3z74mm


Learning to be happy by yourself is great advice. I think you have to date a little to learn who you are though. Humans are relational animals, we learn a lot about ourselves when interacting with others.


That one you don’t need to test drive 😂


“Don’t use the argument that God said so because that can’t be proven.”

No, nor is any attention to be given to the judgment of religious hypocrites who cannot wait to vote for a pervert with a bunch of ex wives, a sexual assault civil conviction, and who was a friend of Jeffrey Epstein’s.


Shots fired 👀


There is no formula. Definitely go out there, have fun and be relaxed. You'll meet what you need if you pay attention to your gut feeling. There's your radar! I have a feeling one year from now you'll found what you are looking for.


Well... 😂


Agreed. My two girls are amazing and constantly surprise me.  Taking them to Puerto Rico next week…should be a great time.


Hope you have a great time. We need great fathers to raise amazing daughters 🫡


Just be a good dad,simple. When u get old and crumble they'll be there.


Lol you mean for men. Lots fail to satisfy a women


Yeah I try to be.  Kind of flaky and adventurous, but at 11 and 13 they think it’s fun most times.  They definitely know I love them and would take a bullet.


Thanks brother! They’re excited about a bioluminescence kayak tour and we’re gonna hike the rainforest there a little bit.


Try not to be flaky, its may be cute in their youth but not so much as they get older. I'm sure that's not your intention. Always always say you love them, its not the same as knowing. You're the first impression of a man in their life so if you mess up, the rest of the men will suffer.


That actually sounds really fun, would be cool to see pitches


It’s a biological function to procreate? What’s the problem with creating a bunch of children you do not provide for and cannot father?  Trolling is gay