Yeah no problem I enjoy these kind of conversations and thought experiments. 

You are right in that when TX fees are an order of magnitude higher opening a self-custodial LN channel will be very costly. I think Ecash or custodial LN will be the go-to in those situations. Which I personally don’t have a problem with. Custodial services will have their place in this environment. 

When 99.95% of an individual’s wealth is properly shielded behind Sha256 then the small transactional amounts moved over custodial L2s as needed aren’t much of a risk at all. And it’ll enable use of Bitcoin for commerce very efficiently. It’ll work well bc custodian services specialize in efficiency and ease-of-use.