I don't know why I like LK's.. my dad touched me as long as I can remember. The people who found out told me that "it was wrong" "I was a victim" "I should feel 'ashamed' , 'disgusted', 'violated'" . I didn't; I liked it. It made me feel loved, when he held me close and i made him feel better then anyone else. I knew he loved me when he would moan my name, I would tell me I was better then anyone he ever had. It felt amazing when he would rub me , nothings felt better. 
I miss that, I haven't been touched since i was 10. 
I need it, want a man to touch me again. it's been 4 years , he's only got 5 and then I can try and see him again. I miss my daddy so much, getting off isn't enough anymore, and I know all the therapists are wrong.
it's not wrong, if it was why did I like it? I don't feel like a victim i just feel like everyone doesn't understand.  I'm consenting , I want it. God I want to be 18. this fucking sucks. he doesn't deserve this